Panic Buttons and Changes

A few weeks ago we had a visit from Aunt Lissa. During that trip I took her to Palapas for a few cocktails with a view. Tessy joined us and we ran into Dea P. one of my former teachers and my Godmother's BFF. I walked her over to meet Shawn and she brought up something about me teaching. It was a very brief conversation. Tessy and I sat down and rejoined Shawn and Aunt Lissa. 

Aunt Lissa looked at me with the Angleson stare and asked me point blank why I wasn't back in the classroom. I sighed, looked at Tessy and said that someday I will. She persisted as a good Aunt should to which Tessy blurted "Cares you need to just DO IT, get OUT THERE! It's not that big of a pay cut. I know you want to be at the High School but it's not going to just fall into your lap." I noticed Aunt Lissa give Tess a look of admiration and agreement as she sipped her T&T. "I know Tessy. I KNOW".  We moved on to another subject entirely and went about our night.

The next morning Aunt Lissa and I were in the car waiting for Shawn to come out of the house and take us to breakfast when she asked me what I had thought about Tessy's comment. I told her that it would most likely be a significant paycut but that I understood that and of course wasn't why I'd get back into teaching. She reminded me what Tessy had said about getting back into it even if it wasn't my ultimate job. It rang in my brain. I knew she was right.

Aunt Lissa left that day but something stayed with me. Two weeks ago I began looking for secondary teaching positions here in Surf City. To my utter surprise there was one. Not only was there one but it was an opening at a school Tess's mom (Aunt Linda) has many times in the past told me I'd be a fantastic fit for. In addition it is also where my previous co-teacher works. I immediately emailed my former co-teacher who seemed just as excited as I was to find the opening and called Aunt Linda to book some time for her to meet with me and write a letter of recommendation.

Now, there isn't much in this world that rocks my confidence to the core but applying for jobs is absolutely one of them. I emailed the Director of the school who promptly returned my email with an invitation to drop of my application and discuss the position with me further in two weeks time.  I got my resume, letter of introduction, credentials and letters of recommendation together.

To know me is to know that I put the cart before the horse. I call this planning. Johnny calls it my panic button. To his credit I used not be in such control of my emotions. I of course discussed this possible career change with Shawn, Winston and Oscar to all lengths. One of the biggest concerns I discussed was the fact that I had only been at my current job 11 months. A good friend of ours helped me get the job. Would this shed him in a poor light if I left so soon? I care about other people and he helped me when I needed it most. I mean, mind you I haven't even met with the director yet! Who spends all this energy worrying about things so soon? This girl.

On Tuesday I met with the director told her about myself and why I'd be a great fit. She was easy to be around and the conversation flowed quite nicely. She told me she was hoping to start interviews Friday.

Thursday I came to work to hear the office drama queen (no, it's NOT me!) yappin' too fast about something I couldn't understand. I walked by the group of people she managed to wrangle around a computer and heard "and we're ALL going to have to COMMUTE now!" I stopped in my tracks to listen further. Just before her head exploded with panic I walked away to my much more calm colleagues and quietly asked what she was going on about. Our CEO sent out an email stating that we were in fact consolidating with our Silicon Valley counterparts and moving our corporate office over the hill.

I didn't panic. I didn't blink multiple times. Instead I smiled inside. This is my way back into teaching without making anyone look bad! I was actually thrilled to have a sign. The rest of our office was in chaos as one peer looked up our new site and another booked happy hour to drown our frustrations. As the day went on I realized I still hadn't received correspondence of any kind regarding an interview. I started to think about having to commute again. One moment I was scared about commuting and the next hopeful that I'd hear back about an interview. All in the confines of my own head and teeny tiny cubicle.

I couldn't express any of this with my friends at work. To be honest I couldn't express this outside my own world. I just didn't have the words. I don't believe in coincidence, I KNOW that things happen for a reason. What I don't know is why I can't be the one to determine the reason. :-) That's just my human limitations. Without admitting it I had put all my hope into this teaching position. Everything looked like it could happen. I had some heavy artillery.  the co-teacher on my side, Aunt Linda who is a VERY prominent figure in the district and someone who has worked very closely with the Director herself. There aren't many secondary teaching positions available over here so I'll just have to remain faithful that it WILL happen. Commuting is of course an option, but one I had hoped with all hopes that I had left behind me. I told Tessy last night that I couldn't wait to see what has transpired 6 months from now and how I was so nervous to interview again. She told me interviewing was like dating in the regard that you'll always ask: "Why didn't they call? I thought it went GREAT!" And she's right. I'm sure the comparison has been made many times before but it makes sense. Here's to another round of courting. Sigh.

Stay tuned, it's an exciting time in the Anglewood household!

Love,
Cares

I Covet....

...this lovely print and think it would go nicely over our bed.

I saw something very similar for a lot more money recently at Warmth Company and was very happy to find it here:

http://www.my-sparrow.com/index2.php#/gallery1/5/