I'm part Angleson; I'm part Blackwood. Just as I'm part Greek and part Mexican. Anglewood is what I attempted to get Shawn to change our last name to, but alas I am now Caroline Blackwood. I was talking with a good friend over the weekend and we both agreed it sounded very old fashioned as if I belonged in a parlor room as a Jane Austen character playing cards, reading poetry, or playing the piano. I could easily fit into that mold if molds were my thing. ;-)
People keep asking me if it feels different to be married, and without hesitation my answer is consistently yes. From the minute I woke up 2 Saturdays ago I felt different. It was a simple epiphany; I am a wife, a partner, an equal p
art to his life now. I am still me, he is still him, but together WE make this life better for each other and It's something I didn't truly understand until it happened.
The past 5 years have been a semblance of that, but the day we promised never to give up on each other forever changed our relationship. I always thought the best stage of a relationship was that first longing, the butterflies that swirled, but I was wrong.
Shawn left for a work conference 2 days after we returned from our trip and it has been hard. You're probably thinking come ON Care, it's 3 days. Sure, he's gone on trips, I've gone on trips, but perhaps it's just the newness of it all that makes it different, or the fact that we've spent the last 2.5 weeks at each other's sides.
Nevertheless it's a new feeling; kind of like how it felt in the beginning. More than butterflies in my stomach, more than a giddy tickle down my spine. We bonded stronger than ever. Is there any better way to gain self confidence than to know that you have someone in your corner who wants to stay there and fight for you no matter what life throws. The ups the downs, the highs and the lows and I have someone who never loses faith in me or my returned love. This commitment, this love is so much more special than anything I ever imagined; this says a lot since I am a girl and always believed those fairy tale godmothers who promised happily ever after.
I am living in a happily ever after that will always take work, patience, love, endurance and most of all faith.
