Monday, oh Monday

Happy New Year! I hope this year brings us all peace, joy and lots of fantastic memories.

Monday morning, well that did NOT provide with a fantastic memory.

Each week day I get up and dread the work day and each morning has it's routine:

Wake up
Let the dogs out
Feed the dogs
Get ready for work
Let the dogs out one last time
Put Winston in his run/garage
Go to work

Hey! I never said it was an EXCITING routine.

Well when I let the dogs out the second time I usually put Winston on his tether so he can chase the birds and be free to run and play for a little while. This makes Shawn tremble with fear that Winston will somehow escape or what I don't know. Shawn's imagination is not a predictable one so I have had no idea what his fear was and didn't pay mind to his conservative methods of managing the dogs. I  just let Winston have his fun outside while I finish up getting ready inside. This has never led to anything weird or unsavory. Until this past Monday.

For some reason I went out to check on things and noticed he was chasing something. Maybe a bird, maybe a gopher, I don't know. What I do know is the moment the thought "Something REAL WEIRD is about to happen" it did.

Winston had run to the side of the house where the water source pipe sticks out far and attaches to his endless water dish. Well with Winston comes his tether and his tether had wrapped around the PVC pipe that connects the pipe to his water dish. The something REAL WEIRD was that as Winston gave up his search for whatever ran that way, he took off in the opposite direction resulting in a very loud SNAP and water GUSHING out into the yard looking something like a geyser.

So what did I do? Oh, only what I do best in situations like these.

PANIC!

ohmygoshwheredoesthispipegotohowdoIturnitoff???

Winston is none the wiser running about hoping I'll see he's picked up his Jolly Ball and toss it across the yard 85 times for him. Oscar, hating confrontation, retreated to the furthest point in the house that still allows a direct view to all of the chaos.

I call Shawn and freak out as I explain what I see in front of me. He of course is cool as a cucumber as I ream him for not putting the wrench back after fixing the garbage disposal.

Well! There's water going EVERYWHERE and I can't shut off the water main without a wrench!

I finally find the wrench but it's not gripping the water main. I call Shawn back and simply tell him he's just going to have to come back home.

Instead he calls Megan R. who is busy getting herself ready. Oh and her 2 kids. Oh and her 2 dogs. Oh and her hubs.

Megan is over in a flash with a cup of coffee in one hand and a wrench in the other. I greet her at the door with my hair soaking and my shirt splotchy. Yep, you guessed right! I tried to push the broken pieces of pipe back together. What?! I was desperate. But this Megan, man She's a real gem. How many girls do YOU know that are that well-rounded and ready to handle any home issue?

And whaddya know? In about 3 seconds flat she's managed to make me look like a fool as her wrench perfectly fits the water main valve as she miraculously turns it off. All while she is wrenching in one hand, holding a conversation with me in between sips of her coffee NOT EVEN LOOKING at the water main.

Blink
Blink
Blink

I mean I used to think I was handy. Well given that I lived with Trixie and Leasy I guess Oscar would come off as handy. Imposable thumbs and all.

So all was back to normal and I was on my way out the door.

I suppose once the babes comes I'll be dealing with all kinds of "fires" like these and then have the rest of the day to tackle. At least it's preparing me.

While the Cat's Away....

Shawn's out of town for 2 nights and while this isn't a big deal, I've always hated it when he goes. He doesn't leave town very often but the codependent part of my soul absolutely hates watching him pack. The passive aggressive part of me wanted to hide all his clean laundry so he'd have nothing to pack and therefore not be able to go! That was only a thought. I made sure he had all the clean clothes he needed. :-)

Finding ways to fill my time for 2 nights wasn't hard. I even took Winston to "school" on Monday to make sure he was good and tired Monday night. He can be very high maintenance in the evenings. This is usually remedied by sticking him on his tethered leash and letting him roam "freely" out back but it's been raining which means mud, lots of mud and Shawn just shampooed the carpets for my Dad's upcoming visit. Muddy dog paws on light carpets don't really match and it makes me break out into hives and I've even been known to seize once or twice because of it. What? I like a clean house!

Anyhow, I filled my Monday with a pot of creamy potato soup shared with Tessy as we watched Monday night football and talked trash to Char online. This was topped off when Tessy asked me if I had plans the next evening. Side note: Tessy has a new BF :-) and when she told him that I hate when Shawn leaves he offered to take me to dinner the following night to help the time go by quicker. SCORE! Two dates in a row with ThankGodForTessy!

I woke up Tuesday morning feeling like I wanted to roll over and spend the entire day in bed but knew I was trying to take Friday off to spend with Dad. I yawned my way through my morning moves, patted Winston goodbye and left for work.

I should have listened to my body.

Suddenly at about 11AM a wave of Hell AKA my allergies washed over me. I was sneezing, coughing, wheezing, sniffling and couldn't find enough tissue to stop my eyes from watering out. I was getting evil glares from my co-workers whose facial expressions shot at me like daggers willing me to go home OR FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP COUGHING/SNEEZING/SNIFFLING! I've been given the okay to take Claritin, but I have a hard time taking medicine in general so you'd be a fool to think I'll easily take it now.

Well I'm the fool for not taking it. I was miserable all the rest of the day long and had to cancel my dinner date with Tessy and her BF. I went home, put on my PJs and hit the sack. At 4PM.

Blink
Blink
Blink

Winston was NOT happy. I tried to coax him with 2 new bones, wet food mixed with his dry food, I even tried to bribe him by telling him he could "play" with the orange cat that keeps teasing him out back. What? I was desperate! And that cat is really mean to stand just-that-close to the edge of Winston's tether.

We both found sleep and I didn't wake up until 9PM. With a splitting headache the size of my newly protruding pregnant ass Texas. I called Shawn and told him he needed to come home. Now. I don't care how, get on a plane and get home. What's so irrational about that? I think he laughed and I swear I could hear him shaking his head through the phone.

I finally got back to sleep and didn't wake up again until a bad dream woke me up at 4AM. And like a fool I tried to cuddle with Winston. Then HE needed to get up. Up and outside we go. But it was wet. So then I was mad at Lee Soloman who told me LIGHT SPRINKLES if anything would affect us. LIAR! I haven't been so angry in my whole life. What's irrational about that? His job is to tell me whether (get it?!) it will be soaked in my backyard like when Winston gets really thirsty and drinks his entire 10 gallon water bowl in one gulp or just damp like when Oscar takes a leisurely sip from his 1/4 gallon water bowl. It was soaked and I had no towel for Winston's muddy feet. AT 4AM. Thanks a lot Lee Soloman. IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT.

He was a trooper and we worked it out.

Fast Forward to 7:30AM. Winston is in the back of the car and we're parked outside of his "school" waiting for the 2 other slow pokes who got there before us to drop their dogs off. One was a chocolate lab who's owner is ALWAYS there at 7:15 knowing full well that school doesn't open until 7:30. Then there was a woman with a snack size dog sitting on her lap in the driver's seat barking at EVERYTHING IT SAW. ANNOYING. We waited until the 2 others were safely inside and made our way in.

"Oh great Winnie, it's that kid you used to not like. I whispered out a small prayer: PLEASE LET THAT SWEET BLOND GIRL BE IN THE OFFICE ...pleasepleasepleaseplease."

The sweet blond girl was nowhere to be found and boy was taking FOR-EVER checking in Winston as I am anxiously looking out for any new snack-sized  dogs that might be making their way in the office. The boy who takes forever finally starts walking us up to the gate to take Winston into his pen when a woman and her snack-sized poodle starts making her way back. I'm not kidding. This poodle was like those small 100-Calorie Oreo cookie snack packs you can buy at the grocery store. What? They're good!

Winston mind you is the picture of calm. Me not so much. "CAN YOU WAIT UP TOP? HE'S NOT THE MOST FRIENDLY!" Now I'm not yelling but so scared that I can feel yesterday's lunch begin to rise up. Winston is sitting beautifully waiting for me to give a command. The boy who takes forever KEEPS WALKING. He has a history with Winston and knows how careful and cautious we are about him. Don't you think he might, you know, DO HIS JOB to prevent any freak out?! The lady keeps coming down clearly confused because the boy who takes forever is clueless. She gets it, turns around and waits up top. PHEW.

We walk by with no issue and Winston doesn't even give the snacked size poodle a second look. I look at the woman and say, "I'm sorry he's just not predictable".

Woman: Blink Blink Blink thinking to herself "Ummmm why is that dog even here then?"

I mean that's what I would be thinking. But Kevin the owner takes ALL dogs. Even dogs that are still intact. That's why Winston goes there. Because they love him there and work with him.

So the boy who takes forever and Winston have a history. Once, back when he was going every day, I asked how Winston was doing and if he was good with all the employees. They said all except the boy who takes forever. And they said something to the effect that Winston wasn't the only dog who took issue with him or that they didn't really like him either. So every time we saw the boy who takes forever I would get a little nervous because I knew this.

Today as I went to hand Winston off to the boy who takes forever he wouldn't go. He didn't charge him or bark or snarl or growl. He simply sat down and pulled back. Twice. I was really proud of him because most times he'll charge a person he doesn't like or at the very least bark that awfully frightening bark. Not today. He just calmly "told" me he didn't want to go with him. I walked him back into his pen and gave him a nice pat and whispered a "good job boy" in his ear. Not because he doesn't like the boy who takes forever, but because he controlled himself.

I apologized to the boy who takes forever and headed out.

Then I called Shawn and bawled my eyes out.

Blink
Blink
Blink

This heightened hormone horses*&! mixed with sleep deprivation is a whole new beast that I don't know how to handle.

I mean, do YOU think it's weird that when a coworker walks over to ask how I'm doing I start bawling my eyes out? For no real good reason? Because I don't.

Hurry home hubz. Please.

Winston the Terrible...

Okay, so I don't think Winston is terrible, but his reputation has been slammed pretty hard with a couple of his outbursts. And I get it.

He's big.
He's scary when he goes all Cujo.
But he's ours.

We love him and have been working with him really diligently. And believe it or not, he's incredibly sweet. We've recently been on the receiving end of some slanderous gossip regarding our pup and I think I could handle it if it were my girls talking about it amongst themselves without the presence of yours truly, but it wasn't MY girl friends but a bunch of guy friends. Yeah, I didn't expect them to sit around gossiping either. Guess it's called something else when guys do it. Whatevs. The point is the conversation ALLEGEDLY didn't only encompass our pup's behavior but "concern" for Shawn's responsibilities should Winnie actually hurt someone. Now I'm nothing if not sensitive and have been known to take things out of context.

Blink
Blink

What?

Well I guess what got me was the fact that Shawn is probably the best problem solver I've ever met and cares more about the well being of his friends and family than anyone I've ever met. Meaning, he actually loses sleep trying to figure out our situation with Winston and has stopped at nothing short of finding a trainer 4 hours away to help us. I just felt betrayed that a friend of Shawn's would ever even think he was sleeping on the job or for one minute would put anyone in a situation that was dangerous. Not only that, but say what you want about ME but he has never nor will he ever, ever say anything about you he wouldn't say to your face. He's got THAT much integrity, ESPECIALLY when it comes to these guys.

Anyway, now that I've gotten that off my chest I can move forward and let go of the bad energy I've been harboring. Mostly in my shoulders. I think a massage is in order. Y'know one of those nice Swedish ones that make you feel like you've had a lie in for hours and are so completely relaxed. Wanna go ride bikes?

So I'll leave you with a situation I recently came home to. If you haven't been to our home yet (RUDE!) then you should know that the kitchen, living and master rooms are separated from the 2 guest rooms (YEP I said 2, what's your excuse?) and garage with a breezeway. When it's raining Winston takes up camp in the hallway and garage just past the breezeway. He happily greets me with the wag swinging of his tail at the door. On this particular day I opened the door to love on him but when I looked all they way down the hall I saw this:

My jaw dropped and stuck to the ground before I could reprimand him or stop him from pridefully running to the ever-so-fun project he had started while we were away. So proud was he that he ran back to me looking like this:

Um. Yes, that IS an entire un-opened roll of paper towels in his mouth. And oh was he ever so pleased with himself. I laughed as I cleaned up the mess and couldn't WAIT to show Shawn the pictures when I got home.

I love my dog.

Robert the Neighbor

So it's really not a secret that Shawn and I have raised two of the most spoiled, co-dependent pups on the planet. Oscar is happiest when he's lying down by your side or even better: in your lap. He's a lap dog after all. A 20-pound-sheds-like-a-buffalo lap dog. :-)

When we brought Winston home I was out of work and therefore with him EVERY DAY. I would leave for a few hours at a time but he stayed in his crate. When I went back to work he went to "school" and made friends with Bella the St. Bernard and Gunnar the German Shepard. It was there that he learned the best thing to do while cooped up in a run in between play times was to bark. LOUDLY. LOUDER THAN THAT DOGANDTHATDOGANDTHATDOG UNTIL THEY LET ME OUT!

Well now that we've moved to the other side of the freeway we've built him a beautiful run and has to be on his own for 10 hours a day. Sometimes longer. I knew he barked and whined but figured he'd just grow out of it and get used to some alone time.

Last Friday as I was running all over the house getting ready to leave for the Sharks game work I heard a knock at the front door.

Cares: (looking confused thinking WHO is HERE?) Uhhh who's there?
Robert the neighbor: You're NEIGHBOR
Cares: (opening the door thinking OH CRAP) Hi!
Robert the neighbor: Hi there.I'm Robert I live next door. Hey nice Sharks Jersey, they better win today! So you're renting Louann's place? Wow I bet her boy must be up to here now.
Cares: Hi Robert, I'm Caroline. Oh, yeah my husband Shawn and I are renting from Louann, you know her pretty well then?
Robert the neighbor: Oh YES. I mean I helped her with all that yard back there. Is she still in Sacramento? Yeah I bet that boy of hers is so tall now. Sheesh.
Cares: Ummm well I didn't know she had a son, but I believe she's in Santa Cruz now. At least that's where our checks are going.
Robert the neighbor: Hmm. Well you know that dog of yours sure barks a lot....
Cares: Yeah...I'm so sorry he's not quite used to being all alone and we're working on getting him trained...
Robert the neighbor: ...Oh no, no, no I mean I was just talking to Mike across the street over there who was saying...now what was he saying again...oh something like 'well the poor pup is probably just lonely y'know'. I  mean I hear him at 7 in the morning when you let him out and I'm already up I get up at 5 but I can hear him.
Cares: (thinking she's pretty sure that's NOT what Mike the other neighbor was saying) Wow, well I'll make sure we're much more careful about it and if it gets worse let us know and we'll figure something out.
Robert the neighbor: Oh no no no, y'know I just got divorced...
Cares:....oh I'm so very sorry to hear that
Robert the neighbor:Oh NO! It's GREAT! I mean we're great friends I just bought her a house in fact. No it's great..I've been on 4 dates...coffee dates NOT dinner dates oh no I'm not ready for that yet. Gotta keep it light. Yeah in fact (chuckles) I had emailed this woman I met on one of those crazy online places...a psychiatrist...gotta be careful with those ones...and apparently she responded but I didn't get it for a few days...you know how these computer things work...who has the time all day? Anyway I called her after I finally got it and man she let me have it. Gotta watch out for those psyche people. Jeesh. Guess that was a good sign, not to take her out, huh? Yeah so if you know any single women...well I'll let you go..just wanted to introduce myself.
Cares: Oh, well great. It's so nice to meet you Robert.
Robert the neighbor: Yeah, you and your husband can come up anytime. We'll have a beer and some BBQ. It'd be great to have you guys. Well good luck to those Sharks!
Cares:(Shutting the door)Okay see you soon!
(looking at Oscar) BLINK BLINK BLINK
WHAT THE EFF JUST HAPPENED OSCAR? 

I ended up putting Winston in the garage that day just in case. Shawn bought the bark collar on his way home that night.

We haven't taken Robert the neighbor up on his offer to have beers and many more stories yet, but I will for the sake of this blog and the comedy that I'm sure will follow. All for the writing my friends.

A few things

I don't have much to report on, but a few fun things have been happening in our world.

1. We've FINALLY got the garage semi-organized. The fact that I can even say we have a garage makes me smile.

2. The dogs are slowly getting used to the new place, though Winston has forgotten his manners and has relieved himself twice in the house. BAD DOG! We're resorting to taking him out every 30 minutes when we're home.

3. A big of Angleson history has surfaced. My second cousin Carlie (Named for the same Caroline Cramer Angleson as I was) found me on facebook. She is my Great Aunt Fifi's daughter. Apparently I met Aunt Fifi in Ventura when I was a wee thing but found it very flattering that out of all the Anglesons on Facebook she asked me if I was part of the Jack and Betty Jane family. I don't suppose it has ANYTHING to do with the fact that we share a name...C'mon that's just TOO obvious. ;-)
It turns out there's also a bit of Angleson drama that stems from oh so long ago ending with the my Great Grandfather Leon cutting Aunt Fifi out of his will. This led to a family estrangement of sorts which is why I've never met my second cousin or her family. Of course I will investigate and hopefully come back with many details.

4. March Madness has me in 2nd place with my Duke pick. If they win this weekend, I could take it all home. So jump on those Duke bandwagons; momma needs a new patio set!

5. I've been running during my lunch hour at work. I'm up to just over 2 miles. Yesterday was my best day yet: I made it all the way up and back and as I was waiting for the light to change to make my way back up the driveway to our building it began pouring. It felt awesome to finish my run it the rain.

6. I'm confessing that I'm super duper nervous to be turning 33. I don't know why this number has me rattled, but it sure does.

Full Moon?

I've heard of animals acting nuts during a full moon or just before an earthquake so brace yourselves friends because the moon won't be full for another 2 weeks or so.

If you know Oscar, then you also know that he likes to spin madly in circles just before you feed him, let him outside, or put on his leash. He's conditioned to know that when we turn the television off, he goes outside and then to bed. Last night I turned the television off and he sprung into action. Except this time he spun so fast he lost control and actually fell down.

I looked up at Shawn and we began to laugh uncontrollably. He was fine of course, and even un-phased by his fall and carried on as if nothing happened. He seemed confused by our raucous laughter wondering what was taking us so long to let him out. He was spinning after all, isn't this how he expresses his need to get out?

Oscar spins all the time, everyday in fact, he's just never spun so hard he's fallen. What a nutty little pug!

The next morning I woke up to the disapproving sound of Shawn's voice downstairs:

"WHAT IS THIS? NO!"

I had no idea what Winston could have gotten into, everything in the living room had been packed for our big move. I got my self out of bed to find out what the commotion was all about. Shawn was smiling, amused by Winston's latest shenanigans and just pointed to the ground.

Blink
Blink

When I was finally able to put a string of words together it was of  course silver lining: "Well, we won't be able to use our TiVo at the new place anyway, way to go Winston. You found a new way to discard anything we don't need."

You can call my dog many things, but you can NOT call him a pack rat.I wonder if the shock from the AA batteries did any damage to his brain. Stay tuned...or not if you are like us and no longer have a remote. :-) (Cue drumline)